My day started off with one of the biggest challenges regarding any medical procedure involving sedation … yep, you guessed it. No food or drinks after midnight. Actually, my restriction wasn’t quite as restrictive as that. I couldn’t eat, but I was allowed to take my morning meds with clear liquids. In fact, I was allowed “clear liquids including black coffee” up until 6 a.m. Wait. When did BLACK coffee become a CLEAR liquid? Doesn’t make sense to me at all. I obeyed, though. Took my pills with water around 5 or so, then nursed a cup of coffee until 5:59. Way to go, Me.
I did wake Chris from her beauty slumber way earlier than her usual. Not to take me to the doc, though. That wouldn’t be necessary until 7 or so. I just wanted her to join me for a romantic stroll to the middle of the street so we could gaze lovingly at the Blue Super Moon and at Saturn, lurking nearby. It was some really beautiful scenery. The astronomical phenomenon wasn’t bad, either.
We arrived for my semi-voluntary alien probe at 8 a.m. sharp. Almost immediately they called us and another victim/ patient. As we approached the surgery suite we chatted. She was having the same procedure. She theorized that the doctor would do two procedures at once, one with each hand (I pictured here … “tentacle”). She said what she did jokingly. If only she knew the truth that’s out there …
The nursing staff were all pleasant and excited to see us. Real party atmosphere. I was led into a room with a hospital bed and told to take my clothes off and put on a robe - the proverbial tie-in-the-back version. I crawled in bed and began the one hour wait for the procedure to begin.
The nurse came in to see me and fill out some paperwork. She asked the question I had been preparing for all week: “What are you here for?” Naturally, I launched into my description of the alien RAI (Radioactive Atomic Incineration) gun and its capabilities. My fellow-abductee … er … neighbor on the other side of the curtain was quite entertained. Not so the nurse. I think she was stunned by my knowledge and grasp of the true situation. She took it in stride, though, and checked off the question on her list.
They finally came and got me and wheeled me, bed and all to the surgery room. They rolled me right up to the procedure table and were going to help be get on. But all I had to do was roll over onto my stomach and I was in place. Done.
I don’t remember much about the procedure other than 3 or 4 stabs of pain. That was by design. Built into the happy juice they gave me.
But immediately after, boy was I ever woozy. I actually needed the wheelchair. Not so much my head this time, though. My right leg just wasn’t sure it could remember the basic “steps” to walking. It eventually wore off, but Chris made me keep my hiking stick nearby.
Oh … when they removed the IV, they also did their best to remove all traces of the alien futuristic intervention. How? They wrapped the area with tape … green tape … with dinosaurs on it. Dinosaurs?Really?
The plan is to take it real easy for a few days. Any pain is to be dealt with through ice packs. Any unusual continuation of symptoms like the wobbly leg, and I am to call right away, and/or go to the emergency room. By Saturday, according to the doctor assistant, I should be feeling “100%” better.
Well … last night was a bit of a challenge. I woke up around 1 a.m. with my back just … hurting. Very strange, too. There was definitely a general aching that was familiar. Mixed in with that were occasional muscle spasms (I was warned about those by the doc). And to top it all off, there were some occasional stabbing nerve pains - the kind that really do wake you up. Rather than take the time to get an ice pack (or rather a bag of frozen peas), I got up and took a Tylenol and worked on another crossword puzzle for awhile. I finally dozed off again, and enjoyed a kind of fitful sleep-ish until I got up for good a little before 5. Now we’ll see how today goes …
John 15:12 says, My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
Father, thanks for guiding that doc’s hand. The relief so far has been nice. Intermittent, but nice. Amen.
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