Saturday, January 9, 2021

January 9 – “The Seventeen Commandments”

I have officially entered the Covid-style information era.  Oh, we’ve been doing FaceBook Live at church pretty much since the beginning.  And one of our small groups has been doing Zoom from the start as well.  But not me.  Not Zoon.  We tried it once when Josh and his boys were setting up a fantasy baseball league, but we never did get it to work.  But now …

 

The chaplain from the local hospital here, UTMB, did a presentation to the ministerial alliance, notifying us that pastors were once again welcomed on campus, to a certain extent.  They are re-issuing visitor badges, so we have to jump through the proper hoops to get vetted.  Of course a lot of the hoops have been generated by Covid protocols, so some things can’t yet happen in person.  The orientation interview for clergy is one of those.  And it was only being done via Zoom.  Hey, how hard could it be, right?

 

I clicked on the link she sent me about fifteen minutes ahead of time, just to give me time to get familiar with everything.  Good thing.  It couldn’t find the Zoom app I had already downloaded on my computer, so it downloaded a new one.  And then, when it automatically opened the new one, there was a message that to receive this particular Zoom meeting, the software I had just downloaded had to be updated.  So it took off doing that.  It finally showed a screen indicating that the host for the meeting would be opening the doors soon.  Guess I did the right things.  Actually I didn’t do anything but watch.  But I was glad I started early. 

 

All of the updates were completed with about three minutes to spare, so I read some while I waited.  The set time for the interview came and went with no change, so I was beginning to get worried that I had left out a step.  But finally her face appeared.  Nice, reasonably cluttered office.  She said hello, and I responded, but she then said she couldn’t hear me, and I needed to unmute myself.  Great.  How do I do that?  A message appeared saying to push Alt-A, so I tried that.  Nope.  I accidentally bumped the mouse, and an options bar magically appeared at the bottom of the picture.  Sure enough, there was a picture of a microphone with an X through it.  I clicked on and started talking again.  Success.  She said she could hear me.  But then she indicated that she couldn’t see me.  Oh, great.  Another button.  But I was an old pro now.  I moved the mouse and the bar reappeared.  And there was a little camera with an X on it.  Click.  Success.  I was viewed.  I apologized for my lack of technological prowess, and explained that this was my first time Zooming.  I said that I was beginning to wonder if I should have called one of my grandchildren to do this for me.  She concurred that generally they are the way to go with all things technology. 

 

The session was pretty simple.  She just went over the “Seventeen Commandments:” the most important things a visiting pastor should know and do.  Things like, “Don’t use your card when you are here to be seen yourself,” and “Limit visits to 30 minutes,” and “If the patient doesn’t want to see you, we will kick you out,” and that all-time favorite, “No proselytizing in the halls.”  She found my photo in the system, so I don’t need to take another for my new ID card.  Now I just need to let them know when I am coming and stop by and pick up the card.  That’ll make me officially official, I guess.  Oh, and she said to feel free to call their office any time I might need them to make a visit for me or to help in any way.  Great folks, those chaplains …

 

Psalms 46:1 says, “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”

 

Father, thank you for the chaplains at the hospital.  Bless them for the work they do there.  Amen.

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