February 7 – “Life Circle”

We made one of those spur of the moment decisions yesterday.  The kind that end up with us in Waco to watch a few basketball games and then head back home to be back in time for church.  Now don’t get me wrong.  We do spend a little time talking to Josh and Christi.  After the boys have gone to bed.  There are some fun things I will share about our time with the boys.  But today, take a look at some of the deep stuff we discussed on the adult level.  I’ve been going to be at 10:00 for so long, I’d forgotten what deep philosophical ramblings can occur when you stay up past your normal brain filter’s bedtime.

Want happiness in life?  It’s all about the right kind of healthy living.

Imagine your life as a circle instead of a timeline.  Time is in fact irrelevant in this world view.  You may spend lots of time in one and a small time in the other in one cycle, but the next time all that may be reversed.  As hard as it sounds, forget about time when you think about this Life Circle.

First, discover who you are on the circle.  Make sure you are healthy physically (That’s the inevitable “Get a checkup.  Exercise.  Eat right.”).  Evaluate your intimate relationships.  Recommit to your spouse.  Hug your son and make a Lego creation together.  Give your daughter a gentle kiss on the cheek and take her on a date. 

Next, like a radius or a spoke on a wheel, make a connection with Jesus, the Center of the circle.  Become a believer in Jesus for the first time.  Reconnect with him through prayer if it’s been a while.

Now you are ready to face that day-to-day circle that is your life.  And if you will look closely at it, you will see three key points that roll through.  Maybe not all three every day, but eventually one, then the other, then the other, then back again.  Take a quick look at those points:

1. Passion.  Each of us has an urgency inside us, something within that nudges us, pushes us, excites us, calls us to “Come over here and get busy!”  That’s called passion, the activity that we find satisfying, that makes us happy when we are doing it.  Find your passion, and if possible make that your work.  It will probably involve risk.  A lot of risk.  But the trade-off in satisfaction is worth it.

Some people never find it, however, because they feel swamped by circumstances and trapped by what they feel they have to do.  They have to take care of the urgent stuff before they can take the time to enjoy their passion.  But then they realize, everything is urgent.  They are in a snare that they see no way out of.

2. When the “tyranny of the urgent” tasks inevitably arise and smother you away from your passion, don’t try to become someone you are not just to deal with them.  Be you. Think, “How would the person I am when I am passionate about a task handle this one?”  Then go for it.  Try a different approach to the same old mundane problem. 

            Now, sometimes the urgent can come so fast and so furious that you can’t keep up.  Those are the situations that eventually lead to depression.  When you hit periods of depression - and you probably will - walk through them methodically.  Now, if the depression has a clinical base and is held in check successfully with medication, take the medication.  Otherwise I have discovered a few ways to battle depression. 

            First, stop.  Yep.  Stop everything for just a moment.  Take a deep breath.  Now, stop looking around at your circumstances.  You need to readjust your focus two ways.  First make sure you are maintaining a focus on the Circle Center (Jesus).  Do the things you were doing when you last felt close to Jesus.  Prayer?  Bible study?  Singing?  Whatever it was, spend some time doing that so you can reconnect. 

            Then turn completely around on the circle and look outward.  Now focus on someone else.  Find someone who is needy.  It doesn’t have to be a homeless guy on the street.  Focus on your spouse, or your kids, or a neighbor, or somebody at church.  They are all – WE are all needy.  Plan and carry out an elaborate random act of kindness for no particular reason.  Focusing on someone else crowds out the constant thoughts of yourself that make up depression.  Oh, and through it all, remember that “joy comes in the morning.”  This, too, will pass.

3. And then, Disengage.  Find some activity that allows you to remove yourself for a time from the hustle and bustle of your thoughts about work and worries.  Give the time you disengage a name – your very own Disengaged World.  Guard it more closely than your most important appointment. 

            This one may have several parts to it.  First, do something that provides you with “me time.”  Be by yourself, even if it’s just a few moments at a time.  Go for a walk or a run.  Go fishing and leave the phone at home.  It’s also important to arrange some Disengage Time with your spouse.  Leave the daily chaos behind and become a courting couple again.  Bask in each other’s presence like you did when you first started dating.  Have some fun together.  And then, if you have kids, invite them into your Disengaged World as well.  It will be much more familiar to them than your “regular” world.  See, they have a knack for “Life in the Disengaged.”  It’s why they are so happy playing with boxes and bows and sticks and balls. 

The three work together if you let them.  Throw yourself into your passion.  When you get discouraged or depressed, refocus and walk through.  Turn to your Disengaged World for release and relief and recharging.  And when that happens, re-enter your passion with new diligence.  Enjoy your next circle.

OK.  That’s all. See?  We can get serious.

1 John 5:12 says, “He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.”

Father, thank you for all of the life circles you have blessed us through.  Thank you for being the centering force.  Amen.