Wednesday, November 6, 2013

November 6 – “Back to School”

We received some schooling yesterday.  Some serious schooling.  April had a late day working in the operating room, so we had Cailyn a little longer than usual.  That meant she had more time to expose us to the rigors of a typical day in her school classroom.  And what better way to do that than to play school?

Cailyn was, of course, the teacher.  Chris was assigned the name Kyree, in honor of one of her school friends.  MeeMaw was now Cailyn.  And my name?  Well, I was assigned to be Justa Beaver.  Go figure.  We each had to wear one of the small plastic fire fighter hats that I picked up at the open house the other day.  Interesting look for a school dress code, but we all complied.  Chris, er, Kyree, was apparently the problem child for the day.  She was instructed to sit with her legs crossed in her chair.  “Criss Cross, Applesauce” was the actual command.  Glad she didn’t say it to me.  I would have had no idea what she was talking about.  Chris knew immediately, however, because right away she said she couldn’t do it.  Ah, gotta watch that insubordination, Kyree.  She was reprimanded with, “If you don’t want to learn and if your leg hurts, then don’t come to school.”  Ouch.

Teacher began class by reading us one of the books she got at the library about coral reefs.  She broke character for a second to ask DadDad what kind of fish she was seeing, and I identified it as a redfish.  Actually I couldn’t tell, but for the sake of the story, it seemed to fit.  She returned to character and to her position in the chair in front of the room.  With a brief wag of the finger she noted, “This is a red fish, and that’s why Justa Beaver is so smart.”  Ha.  Take that, rest of the class.  I’m the teacher’s pet.  Of course she then pointed to a picture in the book and asked Kyree/Chris to identify it.  Chris answered “coral” and received this acclaim: “She is a smart kid because she listens to me.”  We each earned a sticker for our efforts.  MeeMaw got one, too.  I guess because she was being quiet and not disrupting class.

Next phase of the class was “metorolgis.”  Again, I had no clue what that was until Chris translated it to “meteorologist.”  She got to be the helper for this segment.  We had to all sing a song – three times – as the introduction.  Went like this: “Sunny day, cloudy day, rainy day so gray.  Look outside and tell us now, can we go out to play.”  Cute.  Chris looked out the back door and observed that it was too dark to tell what the weather was.  Wrong answer.  She was reprimanded.  Everyone else could tell that it was snowing.  Problem was, we didn’t have a snowflake to use as an indicator.  Now, while this was all going on, Kyree/Chris raised her hand and asked if she could go to the bathroom.  She whispered to me that she really didn’t have to go, she was just trying to get out of class.  But our dear teacher saw right through that ruse, young lady.  She answered, without skipping a beat, “No.  Stay here until we are done.”  Come on, you troublemaker.  Did you really expect her to fall for that one?  Kyree/Chris tried again later, but she was really stopped short that time with, “Would you not interrupt me?  Please.” 

Teacher finally got back to the book and taught us some fascinating facts about sea creature.  “Turtles make babies and lay eggs on the beach.  Sharks can change to whatever color they want to be.  Sharks are not nice.  They bite you.  And an eel and a stingray and a jellyfish.  They are the only things that sting you in the water.  Is there anything else that stings you?”  Wanting to maintain my teacher’s pet position, I offered, “A Portuguese man-o-war can sting you.  They are like a jellyfish, only purple.”  She pondered my offering for a brief second, then replied, “We’re not going to talk about that now.” 

Must have been because it was time for “Letters and Sounds.”  She wrote down a series of random letters, and we had to say them out loud and tell the sound.   W.M.I.B.P.N.  I missed the last one.  I said U.  Didn’t lose my status, though.  She just felt sorry for me and corrected me.  Then we moved to numbers.  1-7. When we got to number 7, though, she admonished us, “Say it louder.”  We tried, but it wasn’t enough.  “Louder.”  I, for one, yelled it.  Ever the curious one, Kyree/Chris broke character briefly and asked, “Does Mrs. Applegate yell?”  At first she simply shook her head to indicate no, but then she seemed to remember something, and said, “Sometimes.”  Of course came the follow-up question, “Who does she yell at?”  And the answer: “The bad people.”  And the follow-up to the follow-up question: “Who are the bad people?”  OK.  Now here is where I am going to choose the better part of valor and not reveal the actual names on her list, but there were a few.  Four, to be exact.  And sadly, three of the four were boys.  Chris then had one more question.  Maybe she was carrying it a bit too far, but if she hadn’t asked it, I’m pretty sure Justa Beaver would have.  “Well, does Mrs. Applegate ever yell at you?”  With a horrified look on her face she assured us, “No.  No way.”  And with that response we effectively ended our school day.

Psalms 119:2 says, “Blessed are they who keep his statutes and seek him with all their heart.”

Father, thank you that our grandkids are all learning about you as well as your world.  Amen.

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