May 6 – “Pondering a mystery”

Chris found Cailyn back in Mom’s room yesterday.  They weren’t playing hide and seek or anything like that.  Cailyn had just meandered back that direction and was standing pensively in the room, looking around.  As Chris walked in and their eyes met, she noticed just the trace of a tear in her eye and a not-troubled, but perhaps a bit confused look on her face.  Wisely she waited for Cailyn to initiate the conversation.  That didn’t take long.  She took a deep breath and one last long look around the room.  Letting out the breath slowly, she pondered, “It’s weird, Nani.  Just weird.  MeeMaw isn’t here anymore, but …”  At this she tapped her own chest slowly and continued, “she’s still here.”  Yes, my little one.  That is one of the many mysteries of love.

I made a commitment to myself this past weekend.  On Monday (that would be yesterday) I would reserve the entire day for family contact only.  I did do some work on the sermon for Sunday, and I did actually look through a few of the emails I have missed over the course of the last few weeks with Mom.  But that primarily meant leaving the phones alone and trying to be available to talk to Chris at any time during the day.  She is still having some pretty painful muscle spasms in her back.  Motrin helps some, but she is moving pretty slowly. 

We did manage to make it over to Cailyn’s school play, though.  Twice.  It was a Cinco de Mayo observation.  The kids had learned Mexican dances and were performing them for each other and for their parents.  Even her pre-K class was involved, and of course Cailyn was the best dancer of them all.  Dressed in the brightly colored skirt and white blouse they loaned her, she made sure her less-than-enthusiastic partner followed her every move.  She was quite proud of her twirls and swings.  I thought it was interesting that at the parents’ version of the play they made all the introductions of dances in Spanish and English.  Made the whole thing last a lot longer than it should have, I thought.  I also thought we were going to be banned from the one they did during the school day.  We came up to watch it and record it, because Nathan was on shift and April is never completely sure when she will get off work.  We checked in at the office as dutiful grandparents, and were told that parents were not allowed to come to the daytime performance.  And that was all it took for us to dig in our heels.  We never said a word.  We just didn’t leave.  The secretary who was rebuffing us just kept on talking, though.  After fumbling around trying to come up with some valid reason for us to not be there, she finally hit on, “When all the children are in the gym there is just not enough room for parents.”  Still we never said a word and didn’t make any move to leave.  Another lady walked in, and the first one looked to her for some help.  She replied, “If they call, I have been telling them no.  But if they are already here …” And she ended with a shrug of her shoulders.  Good enough for me.  We sat down to wait.  As it turned out, we were not the only ones.  Several other sets of parents arrived, but we couldn’t tell what they were told.  Every single conversation was held in Spanish.  Guess that was the secret, being Cinco de Mayo and all.  There was plenty of room in the gym, by the way.  And we got the video with no problem. 

Psalms 30:11-12 says, “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent.  O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever.”

Father, thank you for dancing and music and celebrations.  Gives us kind of a preview of heaven, I think.  Amen.