May 5 – “The Main Thing”

After church yesterday and a few hours of crashing on the couch, I went to another funeral.  I saw in the paper that the mother of a girl I went to high school with had died about five days after Mom did.  The funeral service was scheduled to be held at the old Lutheran church around the corner from my house. At least when I was growing up it used to be a Lutheran church.  Now it is some kind of conference center run by that denomination. 

My plan was to sneak in the back quietly.  Then maybe give Joanne a quick hug right after the service and walk back home.  The first part worked well enough.  Other than the funeral home people recognizing me and giving me a hug and offering their condolences.  Sweet people.  Then when I went into the sanctuary, I saw Gerry, the guy who used to be pastor at that church.  He retired years ago due to ill health, but he was the kind of guy who used to walk around the neighborhood just to talk to people.  He and his wife would organize different kinds of old German street festivals where they would block off streets and invite in bands and have barbeques.  Great folks.  He recognized me right off, so we talked a few minutes.  I finally took a seat right behind another girl from high school, but she didn’t see me.  Well, at least she didn’t recognize me. 

Ray Pinard, chaplain to every old person on Galveston Island, led the service.  Each of the four children had some things to say in the eulogy time, so I was able to locate Joanne and begin making plans for my quick hug and exit plan.  Everyone who spoke mentioned some aspect of the lady’s Christian faith and how she lived it out as an example.  Several of them quoted or read scriptures that were her personal favorites.  I especially got a kick out of the brother who remembered kneeling around their Mom and Dad’s bed and saying prayers, one of which was in Swedish.  He said none of the completely understood what it meant, but boy did they ever learn it.  He started quoting it, and before he finished, all the siblings and, it sounded like some of the grandchildren, had joined him in a sort of legacy of prayer.  As the last speaker finished, Ray led us all in the Apostles’ Creed.  All that was left was the Lord’s Prayer and benediction.  But apparently Ray had noticed the other two pastors in the crowd.  He blindsided both of us and called for both of us to come to the front, hold hands with him, and together we led in the Lord’s Prayer.  Joanne’s head whipped around as she mouthed, “Kelley Vaughan?  What is he doing here?”  Patty, my other classmate, was quite surprised as well, especially when it became apparent that I had been sitting right behind her the whole time.  As unexpected as it was, I thought it was a really cool expression of the kind of solidarity that matters.  See, Ray is a Methodist.  Gerry is a Lutheran.  I am a Baptist.  Together we were standing for Jesus.  That’s what I like.  Focus on the main thing, not the different things. 

I found out after the service that not only had the family gone through this death of a mother just 13 days shy of her 100^th birthday, but they also had just had a wedding of one of her grandchildren the night before.  And the couple had insisted on staying for the funeral.  Wow.  Joy tinged with sadness.  What an incredible start to that marriage. 

Ephesians 4:2-6 says, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.  Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.  There is one body and one Spirit— just as you were called to one hope when you were called— one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.”

Father, thank you for the unity of your Spirit.  Walk with Joanne and her family through their experience of grief mixed with joy.  Amen.