June 15 – “Census Man and the Silenced Squeak”

We had a visit from the United States Census Bureau.  Really.  He had a badge and everything.  He also had a strange and bewildered look on his face.  I asked him if I could be of assistance and he replied, “I sure hope so.  I’m here to interview people who failed to respond in any way to the census questionnaire we sent around.”  OK.  Didn’t that happen back in 2010 or something?  But he seemed in such distress, so I encouraged him to continue.  “I was assigned to interview the folks at … let me see … 7009 Sycamore.  Now this house is 7005, isn’t it?”  Ah.  Now I saw where this was going.  Doing my best to restrain a chuckle, I assured him that 7005 was indeed our address.  “And that house over there,” he said, pointing to the other side of the vacant lot, “is 7013?”  I affirmed him in his investigative abilities.  “Well, then …. What the heck happened to 7009?”  And there it was.  I couldn’t hold back any longer.  The laugh just kind of exploded from within me.  I so wanted to drag out the fun, but this poor, harried guy was having quite a time of it.  I explained that the house had been abandoned in 2008 after Hurricane Ike, and only recently the city had torn it down.  He breathed a long sigh of relief, and asked me if I would sing off on his form to prove that he talked to an actual eyewitness who confirmed that the house no longer existed.  We even talked a few more minutes and I found out that he lived in Jamaica Beach.  Right down the street from Seaside Church.  Small world, Mr. Census Man.

I also traded in a pair of shoes.  I had a brand new pair of Nike crosstrainers.  I got black so I could wear them on fire department visits.  The problem was … they were the noisiest shoes I have ever owned.  I thought the whole point in them being called “sneakers” was that you could wear them to sneak up on someone.  I couldn’t even put them on in our bedroom in the morning because the racket would wake Chris up.  Loud squeaks with every step.  It got really annoying.  I did discover an app for my Iphone, though, as a result.  It is the computer streaming option for the Christian radio station I listen to, KSBJ.  So wearing my earphones and listening to the radio drowned out the din pretty well.  For me.  I decided to give everyone else a break, though, and do the return.  As it turned out, it was a good thing I liked the shoes otherwise.  Because I waited a day or two longer than a month, the only option I had was to switch them out for an identical pair.  And that option was strictly because of the grace of the store manager, or so he said.  I know from past experience that Nike will take them back, though, so Academy will not be hurting too much.  I’m beginning to miss that ever-present evidence that I can still get around on my own two feet, though.  Squeak.  Squeak.  Squeak.  Squeak …

Psalms 95:3-5 says, “For the Lord is the great God, the great King above all gods.  In his hand are the depths of the earth, and the mountain peaks belong to him.  The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land.”

Father, thank you for seas and census men and shoes that squeak.  Amen.