February 6 – “Now you can see”

We had a day with Cailyn again yesterday.  Actually it was just a few hours, but she always makes a day of any experience with her.  This one included some tense moments, though.  She was here when I returned from a doctor’s appointment in Houston (just a recheck with the neurologist.  He prescribed my medication in a different form so it wouldn’t cost as much.  Always a plus).  And she most assuredly had an agenda for the day all planned out.  At least for me.  Now she did allow me to finish the work I had to get done, so kudos to her for that.  But every so often I heard appeals like, “Come on, DadDad be a girl” and “I wish you were a girl, DadDad.”  Of course I indicated that I was not too happy about that thought.  My responses ranged from “I’m happy being a boy” to “Why would I want to be a girl?”  Never should have put that in the form of a question.  She had a ready reply.  “Because then I could put fingernail polish on you, DadDad.  Let me put fingernail polish on you.  I’m ready to do it now …”  Chris quickly informed me that it was real fingernail polish, not the washable kind she had last time she was here.  She even made a big deal out of showing me the job Cailyn had done on her fingernails.  And then, bless her heart, Chris ran point for me so I could finish up the work I was doing, but then I was on my own. 

Ever diligent, Cailyn knew right away that I had come to a stopping point.  She sidled up to me at my desk.  As I mentioned, I had just completed a portion of work on my computer, so I was leaning back in my chair and rubbing my tired old eyes.  She tried one more time, “Are you done yet, DadDad?  I’m ready to put fingernail polish on you.”  Filled with a renewed sense of self-preservation, I replied in my best grandfatherly tone, “I’m not going to let you put anything on my nails until I see with my own eyes the acetone that will be there to remove it when I decide not to be a girl anymore.”  See my technique there?  “Acetone.”  Use one big word that there is no way she will understand.  Just enough to confuse her and buy me some more time.  And did it work?  Well, not so much.  She quickly scoped out each of the articles on my desk until her eyes lit on the one she was searching for.  Those eyes lit up and she broke into a huge grin.  And she handed me … my glasses.  When I do work on the computer I don’t wear my glasses.  “Here, DadDad.  Now you can see.” 

The rest of the story?  Fortunately Chris called out for her to join her outside.  The allure of the outdoors was too much to resist, so we adjourned to the front yard for all new types of fun (fodder for another day’s journal) until her Mom arrived.  She didn’t forget, though.  I can still hear her words as we left together to join Nani in the front yard.  “It’s OK, DadDad.  We can do your nails tomorrow.”

John 9:25 says, “He replied, ‘Whether he is a sinner or not, I don't know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!’”

Father, thank you for opening my eyes to what counts.  Relationship is way better than acetone.  Amen.