September 5 – “Public sleeping techniques”

 

 

Yesterday started out pretty good actually.  Cailyn spent the night with us, and she let us sleep all night.  I was even able to get up at my usual time and not wake her up.  Church was great again.  Ryan filled in for Jimmy and did his usual tremendous job of leading worship.  John was there playing the drums for the first time on a Sunday morning, and they added a lot to the sound.  He was excited after the service, too. He said, "You got me for Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Sundays for sure."  That would be rehearsal, youth worship, and Sunday worship.  The teaching seemed to go well.  I didn't see anyone go to sleep, but I could have missed it if they knew what they were doing. 

 

There are several ways to sneak in a nap while appearing to be listening to a speaker.  Of course the initial assumption is that he is not going to be very interactive with the group.  If there is a chance he may actually expect feedback, then forget about these options.  The only recourse in that situation is coffee, gum, drawing pictures, or if all else fails, actually listen and take notes.  Desperate times often call for desperate measures. 

 

So one approach if you have a desk or table in front of you is to place your elbow firmly on the table and rest your chin on your fist.  It appears that you are so intent on the words being spoken that you are leaning forward so as not to miss a one of them.  Variations on this one include the double elbow lean on fists, the double elbow on open palms, and the fingertips to the side of your head as if in deep thought.  In church of course you can do all the variations of "in prayer" that are limited only by your own creativity.  The secret to these is keeping your hands folded.  If you can do that, you can easily rest your forehead on your hands and appear to be postured in humble submission.  There are some masters who can lock their head in one position needing no visible form of support.  And some of them have mastered the art of keeping their eyes at least partially open while they doze freely.  The eyes open trick is next to impossible, so another option is wearing glasses.  They make you look studious like you plan to look something up, and the glare from the lights makes it very hard to see is your eyes are open or closed.  Now these are just some observations I have made over the years.  Not that I have ever tried any of them myself.  And certainly not that I recommend any of them in particular for church or school.  Just remember.  No matter which method you employ … don't snore.  You'll keep the person next to you awake.  That's rude.

 

Proverbs 25:13 says, "Like the coolness of snow at harvest time is a trustworthy messenger to those who send him; he refreshes the spirit of his masters."

 

Father, I understand the trustworthiness and refreshing spirit.  But what is this coolness?  And snow?  It's been a long time.  But thanks for the summer.  Fishing has been pretty good.  Amen.