September 8 – “That point”

And soon the inevitable question began to come forth from those outside, those not on Great Island.  "Is everything back to normal?"    Ah.  Normal.  And what, indeed, constitutes "normal" anyway.  For the Island would never be the same.  Great trees that had grown long and stood tall through wars and storms and days of peace were now gone, destroyed, despite their own valiant efforts at survival and the desperate attempts of the Islanders to save them.  In their place came the young saplings, mere shadows of the greatness that preceded them.  Yet the saplings themselves radiated a glimmer of hope for the future, a spark here and there of determination to continue on, to rebuild, to create a new "normal."   And Great Island, from deep within its soul, took a deep breath, and exhaled, and then … took another.  For that is the way of life.  And life had returned.   It's 3:30 in the afternoon and I have reached "that point."  I guess it's different for everybody.  I know it's not always the same for me every day.  But "that point" sneaks up on you when you don't expect it.  It is always around, but doesn't always explode on the scene.  Sometimes you can hold it in.  Sometimes you are so engrossed in something else that you forget about it.  Sometimes you are so tired that nothing you do can keep it away.  Sometimes it's not that you're tired, you are just overwhelmed.  You have so many things to do that you can't bring yourself to choose one of them and start doing it.  Or you have that one really big thing that seems to never go away but you do everything you can to do everything else first.  Sometimes it's not even about what you have to do.  You just have stressor after stressor building up in your life with noplace for the steam to be released.  "That point."  It's here right now.   And that's why I picked doing this.  "That point" is not something I have ever talked about.  Still not talking, just typing.  It generally causes me to focus on my weaknesses or those outside stress factors.  I'm in pain.  Chris is not here and hasn't been for three months and we have no idea how much longer she will be gone.  We're changing things around at church, albeit temporarily, but the stress and hassles are still real.  It's amazing how "permanent" a "temporary" can feel when you're in the middle of it.  Mom needs help pretty much every day now with something, whether it be remembering to eat or getting a ride to water therapy three times a week.  Somebody's gotta handle cleaning the house and taking care of the yard and the dogs.    And sometimes I just don't want to.  I get to "that point."  Ever been there?   John 20:19-20 says, "On the evening of that first day of the week, when the disciples were together, with the doors locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, 'Peace be with you!'  After he said this, he showed them his hands and side. The disciples were overjoyed when they saw the Lord."   Father, thanks for the "with you" promises.  Amen.