August 4 – “If I had been a boy”

No fish yesterday unless you count the hundreds of little tiny gaftop catfish that ate my bait every cast or the long needle-nosed eel I hooked using a spoon lure.  It's pretty bad when you can't even catch a decent hardhead catfish (not that they are ever decent).   Chris' Mom has a blood clot in her leg.  It is swelling a lot and painful.  Some days it even turns blue.  But the doctors say there is really nothing else to do.  She has been dreaming (or not) some strange stuff that she interprets as signs that it's time for her to go.   The other day when I was in Bay City Chris' Mom woke up upset and even agitated.  She was looking for a little boy she had seen and couldn't find him.  We assumed she was talking about her son Mark.  Chris calmed her down by assuring her that Mark was in Victoria with his family.  This morning Chris sent me a text saying she had found the boy.  She even knew his name.  It was the name that would have been Chris' "if I had been a boy." She said she knew that was a sign but she's still not ready.    Mom is back in water therapy three times a week.  After the first two sessions she has come out totally exhausted.  It'll get better.  So far all she does is walk around in the water with ankle weights on her feet and one of those long skinny hunks of foam under her arms.  I for one always got excited about it when my kids were going to dive for the first time.  We may have a ways to go for that one with Mom for that particular milestone.   OK.  I've been off the rheumatoid arthritis medications for almost a day now.  I have tried not to focus on it.  The only thing I haven't been able to completely disregard are my fingers and toes and knees.  It's not the sharp, stabbing pain.  It's more of a dull, behind the scenes ache right now.  So far my left elbow has stayed quiet.  That was always the big indicator before.  We'll see.  My next appointment is not for another two weeks or so on the 20th - Mom's birthday.   Speaking of birthdays.  Chris' is the 17th.  I have no idea what she could use or even what she might want right now other than some peace in the midst of tension and turmoil.    Isaiah 26:3-4 says, "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.  4 Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal."   Father, thank you for being the Rock.  Help me and Chris keep our minds steadfast with trust in you.  Amen.