June 21 – “Neuro results”

Well, the results of my trip to the neurologist were shockingly familiar.  After a test that would rival acupuncture (I was hooked up to a little machine and they sent electrical waves through my arm and neck.  Then they stuck needles in at various sites and repeated the impulses.  I think it's to determine nerve damage), he did his usual inspection – tapping my knees and such.  The decision?  The tingling and numbness I have been having in my left arm are the result of a bulging disc in my neck, probably complicated by spinal stenosis, a narrowing of the spinal chord area.  No surprise there.  I have heard it all before.  Three times.    He went through his whole required speech about the course of treatment.  I interrupted him a few times with, "Yep.  That one never works," or "At least you're not mentioning the test Satan invented and plays a personal role in every time it is administered" (That would be a myelogram.  Dye is inserted into the spinal column near the lower back.  The table is then tilted so the dye can flow up toward the neck.  The trick is to level out the table before it gets to the head, because the dye causes severe headaches.  The ones I have had have always reached my head.  And the last one took its time getting there.  The stenosis blocked the easy flow. So the fluid spread out into my lower back causing excruciating pain there.  I don't recommend that one.).  He agreed that it was best Satan not be invited into the process.  But then, he's not the one who orders the myelogram.  That's the neurosurgeon's responsibility.  WooHoo.  More to look forward to.   He scheduled me for an MRI again.  I called that one ahead of time, too.  Since I have an eye doctor appointment in Houston Friday afternoon (cataract doc), we got that one for Friday morning.  Unless the water is really pretty for fishing.  In that case maybe I can postpone it all and disappear into the water Friday.   I have to do some physical therapy when I get back from camp.  He included some orders about strengthening my lower back as well to help with that pain.  But the worst step of all for this trip is that I have to take another round of steroids.  Last time I didn't sleep for three days.  Maybe the other arthritis meds I'm taking (at least three of which warn about drowsiness) will cancel some of that out this time so I can sleep some.   We did have a bit of married people type fun.  We joked about the inevitable patient questionnaire.  The best question award this time went to: "Do you forget things or have trouble with confusion?"  The question confused me.  I pointed it out to Chris, and in her best nurse voice she read it back to me out loud and asked, "Well, do you forget things?"  I told her I couldn't remember.  She chuckled and said something like, "Oh, you're so confused."  Everything the rest of the day was all about me forgetting or being confused.  I stick by my answer, though – "Non-essential information is not required.  All other things remembered are a bonus."   Ecclesiastes 7:14 says, "When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as the other."   Father, I guess that means that our response to bad times should once again be, I trust you.  I do.  Amen.